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FORUMET REDD VÅRE BARN • View topic - Vitser om "barnevernet"
It is currently Tue Nov 13, 2018 5:11 pm



Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 10 posts ] 

Hvorfor tar det tre år å bli "barnevernspedagog"?
Fordi "studentene" først må lære seg å lese 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Fordi det tar "studentene" tre år å lese første kapittel av Kari Killéns "Omsorgssvikt" 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Fordi "studentene" må bruke 2 år og 11 måneder på avrusning før studiet kan begynne 17%  17%  [ 2 ]
Fordi det er et særdeles krevende studium med strenge eksamenskrav 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Fordi den gjennomsnittlige "studenten" har IQ på 55 17%  17%  [ 2 ]
Fordi 99,8 % av "studietiden" brukes på fyll og fest 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Fordi hjernevasking er en prosess som gir best resultat jo lenger den foregår 58%  58%  [ 7 ]
For at "studiet" skal kvalifisere som høgskole 8%  8%  [ 1 ]
Total votes : 12
Author Message
 Post subject: Vitser om "barnevernet"
PostPosted: Wed Jul 01, 2009 12:53 pm 
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I DDR fantes det mange om Stasi, det allestedsnærværende hemmelige politiet. I Norge lever de fleste naivt uvitende om at det såkalte "barnevernet" har like inngripende fullmakter som Stasi. Derfor mangler floraen av vitser om "barnevernet".

Jeg har tenkt å bøte på denne kulturdefekten ved å komme med følgende beskjedne bidrag til en ny vitsekultur om "barnevernet", som dessverre blir tatt alt for høytidelig i vår selvopptatte "kulturnasjon":

1. Spørsmål: Hvor lang tid bruker en barnevernskonsulent på å skifte en lyspære?

Svar: 2 timer. 5 minutter på å skifte lyspæren og 1 t 55 minutter på å skrive et journalnotat om hendelsen.


2. Spørsmål: Hva får du om du parrer en politimann med en "barnevernspedagog"?

Svar: En "barnevernsvakt".


3. Spørsmål: Hva får du om du parrer en "barnevernspedagog" med en kommuneadvokat?

Svar: En tingrettsdommer.


4. Spørsmål: Hvor lang tid bruker en tingrettsdommer på å fatte en dom i en "barnevernssak"?

Svar: Tiden det tar å lese gjennom "sakkyndig"-rapporten.


5. Spørsmål: Hva er likheten mellom en "barnevernspedagog" og en alligator?

Svar: Begge har barn på menyen.


6. Spørsmål: Hva er forskjellen på en alligator og en "barnevernspedagog"?

Svar: "Barnevernspedagogen" smiler bredere når hun sluker byttet sitt.


(Tillatelse til publisering av bildet er innhentet fra de to barnevernspedagogene. Bildet er tatt utenfor en lokal "barneverntjeneste". Dersom du "trenger hjelp" til å knuse livet til naboen eller andre fiender utenom kontortiden, ring "barnevernsvakten".)

:D

Jeg gir stafettpinnen videre..

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 Post subject: Offentlig samkvem
PostPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 10:37 am 
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Spørsmål: Hva får du om du parrer kommuneadvokat X med "barnevernsleder" Y?

Svar: Et .

:oops:

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“ Whoever may be guilty of abuse of power, be it Government, State,
Employer, Trade Union or whoever, the law must provide a speedy
remedy. Otherwise the victims will find their own remedy. There
will be anarchy.” Lord Denning (1899-1999)


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Jul 04, 2009 1:47 am 
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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Jul 04, 2009 3:44 am 
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 Post subject: Middel mot "barnevernsvakter" etterlyses
PostPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2009 2:26 pm 
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“ Whoever may be guilty of abuse of power, be it Government, State,
Employer, Trade Union or whoever, the law must provide a speedy
remedy. Otherwise the victims will find their own remedy. There
will be anarchy.” Lord Denning (1899-1999)


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jul 07, 2009 6:37 pm 
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Kamera var en god ide :D


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Mar 22, 2010 12:19 am 
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(Eksil i Danmark. Spør dersom du har problem me språket )


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 Post subject: Altfor trygge offentlige arbeidsplasser
PostPosted: Sat Jun 05, 2010 10:45 am 
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Spørsmål: Hvorfor får ikke kommunalt ansatte barnevernspedagoger ha på seg tresko på jobben?

Svar: Det er risiko for at de slår rot.

Var den morsom, eller? :D

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“ Whoever may be guilty of abuse of power, be it Government, State,
Employer, Trade Union or whoever, the law must provide a speedy
remedy. Otherwise the victims will find their own remedy. There
will be anarchy.” Lord Denning (1899-1999)


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 Post subject: Re: Vitser om "barnevernet"
PostPosted: Wed Aug 03, 2011 7:00 am 
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Så var det den dyslektiske satanisten som solgte sjela si til staten..
:lol:

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“ Whoever may be guilty of abuse of power, be it Government, State,
Employer, Trade Union or whoever, the law must provide a speedy
remedy. Otherwise the victims will find their own remedy. There
will be anarchy.” Lord Denning (1899-1999)


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 Post subject: Re: Vitser om "barnevernet"
PostPosted: Wed Aug 03, 2011 11:39 am 
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-rom-
Litt omskrevet:

Den dyslektiske satanisten solgte sjela si til staten. Ble lykkelig ansatt i BUFetat. Jobb: Fikk ofre barn til Mammon. Inspirert av Killén utbrøt han entusiastisk:
- Tidligere var det over på sekunder. Nå varer det i generasjoner!
-rom-

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